The Frames of Perception

In my last article, I spoke into the power of intention. In the one before that, I shared the importance of attention. Today, I would like to share the third and final prominent ingredient of perception: framing.

Put simply, we can condense conscious experience down to:

Where you are looking: Attention
Why you are looking there: Intention
How you are interpreting what you are looking at: Frame

It is easy to believe that we are simply observing an objective reality. But much of our experience is shaped by the contextual frame through which we perceive it.

A simple example would be:

Objective event: A football hits the back of the net in a soccer game.

Team A frame of reference: We have scored a goal, eliciting joy and celebration.

Team B frame of reference: We have conceded a goal, eliciting sorrow and commiseration.

Same event attended to, different frames experienced through, different emotions generated.

We are constantly framing our experience, and often we do this unconsciously. We are also constantly having things framed for us.

For example:

Event: Donald Trump becomes president.

Right-wing media: Donald Trump, a courageous free-speech advocate and anti-establishment figure, returns to office promising to restore freedom and prosperity.

Left-wing media: Donald Trump, an authoritarian and divisive political figure, returns to office threatening marginalised communities and democratic institutions.

Our power and sovereignty come through our ability to spot the frame and, when necessary, reframe it.

Yesterday, I was a bit tired after taking my daughter Dahli (1) and son Atlas (6) out to the park for a couple of hours while my partner went to the gym. When I got home, my back was hurting from having Dahli in the carrier the whole time and running after my boy.

In my mind, I had completed my bit of fathering duty for now and was about to embark on a couple of hours of work and perhaps even a little music.

When I got home, however, my partner reminded me that she wanted to attend a day-long online workshop.

This landed in my body like a lead balloon.

I told her I needed 15 minutes alone on the balcony. I made myself a cup of cacao and went and sat outside.

I sat down and was inundated with my victim frames:

“This isn’t fair. I am so tired. How am I going to entertain them for the day? Now I have to find the energy to do this. I’ve already been out all morning. Etc, etc, etc.”

Then I notice the frames.

They are making me feel angry, disempowered, tired, resentful and hard done by.

I have a little mantra I have developed for myself:

To win the game, change the frame.

So I begin to do so.

I think:

“I don’t have to spend time with my kids, I get to. They are only going to be this little for so long. The sun is shining. Perhaps I can see if a friend wants to join me. Prue will be lit up by doing this workshop, and I will feel good that I have created the space for that. The time I need to work and create will come.”

This elicits in me feelings of motivation, resilience, trust, peace and love.

I ended up having a beautiful day with my kids and some of my friends. And now I am doing the writing, with a happy Prue upstairs.

There are certain archetypal frames that we all have to deal with, and what is interesting is that each negative frame has a positive inversion.

By noticing when we are experiencing the negative expression of a frame, we can consciously move towards its positive inversion. This can have a profound effect on our experience.

This isn’t about spiritually bypassing the things we are challenged by. If we are tired or struggling, it is still good to acknowledge it and, if necessary, share it.

This is about taking ownership of how our frames shape our experience and choosing them more consciously.

Here is one of the archetypal narrative frames:

The Victim vs The Creator

(From: I have to. To: I get to.)

The Victim

This is one of the most pervasive and ubiquitous frames. It is tricky because it is often justifiable, but it disempowers us nonetheless.

It tells us that it isn’t fair. That someone else is to blame. That we are hard done by.

It makes us feel resentful and robs us of our agency and power.

The Creator

The creator is the opposite of the victim.

It tells us:

“I might not be able to control my circumstances, but I can choose how I respond.”

Challenges are invitations.

We have the power to shape our experience of reality.

It elicits in us empowerment, agency, motivation and creativity.

My invitation to you today:

Become a frame-spotter.

Before you react, pause and ask yourself:

How is this being framed?

Is this frame serving me?

Can I reframe it?

In my next email, I will discuss some more of these archetypal narrative frames.

Until next time,

With peace and love,

Alex